Wednesday, May 28, 2014

The Wonderful World of SOVs




     I talk to a lot of horror fans daily, and it's always amused me that when I bring up the topic of SOVs, that they don't have a clue of what I'm talking about. That's because the SOV is horrors best kept secret. Having died about 20 years ago, the sub genre of SOV is usually only known to fans who were around during their hey day. That's about to change, as SOVs are primed to make a comeback. That said, I figured I'd school all my little sicko's on this little known but great source of cheap horror.

     Gather round my young padawans, as I school you in the forgotten history of horror...
   
     Once upon a time, during a magical time known as the 1980's, horror films had suddenly become very popular. The genre was in it's glory, and people craved more. At this time, VHS came into being and the birth of the video rental store followed. Not long after that, the "Straight to Video" market was born. Now fans could rent their fav movies for a low price anytime they wanted and studios could put more movies out of lesser quality straight to the retail market. But that wasn't enough for some. For Joe Horror and friends, making their own horror flicks was the ultimate achievement. A new technology landed on store shelves that would help with this big time. The Camcorder had come out and made home recording easy as pie. Prior to that, you had to shell out big money for either a 16mm camera or a Super 8 not to mention editing equipment. The Camcorder, while not cheap, was much more affordable and had better picture quality then the Super 8, plus ya didn't have to play with film rolls, ya just needed a VHS tape and a little video editor you could plug right into your TV. The result was an SOV or "Shot On Video".
     Initially, fans would simply share their films with family and friends, but eventually some young enterprising horror fan decided to talk to their local mom and pop video rental store and get them to rent their flick to the public. This wasn't a problem for the stores because it was a no lose situation. Didn't cost them anything to put the video on the shelf and they got a cut of the take for rentals. "Straight to Video" was still fairly new in those days and the output from the various studios wasn't huge, as theater runs were still the best way to maximize profits, so these young Spielbergs were actually helping meet demand, especially for horror, which was big business at the time. The SOVs actually did well, even though many of them were utter garbage. Fans had a plentiful source of horror for a low rental price. It worked out for the stores and the film makers. (I use the term loosely.)
     This continued until the mid 90's when it eventually died a quiet death. This was due to horror movies being on a serious decline and the rise of corporate rental chains such as "Blockbuster" and "West Coast Video". The home video market had since been discovered to be a lucrative market and the output was much larger then it had been in the past and the quality was almost as good as what was playing at the movies. The rental chains were not interested in local film makers low budget offerings, especially horror. So, the end of SOV era had come.....until now.

     These days you can shoot a film on your Iphone and the quality isn't that bad at all, infact it's been done a few times already. Technology has come a long way and recording your own shiz is really cheap now, and with computers to help do the editing and the web to help distribute your masterpiece, SOVs have been seeing a renaissance of sorts recently. Factor in that horror as put out by big studios has been seriously lacking. It makes sense that with the advancement in technology and the demand for decent horror that SOVs have returned to fill the void. Films like "To Jennifer and Hate Crime" are only two prime examples of modern SOVs and how even though done cheap can be very entertaining.

     But as the horror world begins to learn about the new wave of SOVs coming out, very few know about the treasure trove that was produced in the 80's and 90's. There's enough offerings to make a horror hound dizzy with excitement.
     A few things must be said though. These films are VERY low budget. (Usually had a 2,000 to 3,000 dollar budget.) Some are better quality than others, but few are studio quality. Think Troma. The acting is done by no names who shouldn't get work in an infomercial let alone feature film, and the special effects can be really lousy at times.
     Another thing worth mentioning, if you decide to take the plunge into SOVs of days gone by (I recommend that you do) be sure to do your homework. There are a lot of SOVs that were produced back then and not all of them were watchable. To be blunt, they were garbage. Pure dreck not worth a nano second of your time. You watch a few of those and you'll prob think that's all SOV has to offer and you'll miss out on the good stuff, and there is some really good gems to be seen. Either spend some time researching various offerings or ask someone who knows their shite for recommendations. (I'll throw ya a few bones at the end of this shiz.)
     Something good to remember is that beyond being low budget, these were made in the 80's and 90's. You may read about a flick and have it tell you that it's ultra violent and gory, only to watch it and see fake as hell effects and not so shocking violence. In it's time some of it WAS gory and shocking to viewers, especially since the big studios didn't generally go that far with violence, but by today's standards it's tame. That doesn't mean there isn't some genuinely shocking and gory moments. Some of these flicks could be down right sick and they hold up well to this day.

     So why haven't you heard of them before? Chances are you have and didn't know it. HBO and Cinemax used to play some late at night. Ya know, that horror flick you watched once and never heard about again?
     For the most part, SOVs weren't put out by professional studios and they didn't have mass distribution. Most of the folks putting the stuff out did their own leg work. That meant you weren't going to find them for sale at your local K-Mart or any other retailer for movies. Occasionally they'd sell copies at the mom and pops stores they had deals with, but most of the time each movie you rented had a screen in the beginning that would pop up before the movie and tell you where to write to purchase the movie you were about to see or get a catalogue of all they offered. Some managed to snag small distribution deals thus reaching a wider audience. ("Boarding House" which was the first SOV, got a very short run in theaters. Far as I know it's the only one to do so.) but it usually ended up costing more to go that route than self promotion. This was a very do it yourself genre. The result is that finding an original copy is like trying to find the "Ark of the Covenant". If you do locate one, chances are it's owner is gonna charge you out the bung hole for it. Good news though, apparently Amazon has a small selection of some of the better flicks available for sale and on DVD at rock bottom prices, like 5 bucks. However, you can find damn near all of them on YouTube for free. Just type in "Horror SOVs" you'll get a giant selection of old and new offerings.

     At the end of the day, if your a hardcore horror hound and you don't mind really low-budget, there is much good times to be had. Just don't expect high art, this shiz is NOT meant to be taken seriously. Turn your brain off and just go with it. They can be a load of fun and some of them are pretty damn creative.
     Like me your prob bored with the offerings the genre displays these days. Well, you now have an entire new and forgotten area of horror to explore. I have opened the door for you to hundreds of classic stuff from the 80's and 90's and new stuff coming out each day. (Amazon Prime is a great source of modern streaming SOVs) Who loves ya baby?

    I'll end this lesson class by recommending some good SOVs to start with, just to give you an idea of what you're in for:

Sledge Hammer: 
     A guy goes around killing teens with a sledge hammer. See trailer below, it says all you need ta know.

Boarding House:
     Peepz reopen an old boarding house and bad shiz starts happening. Gore, nudity, and a belly full of laughs. This flick is AWFUL in every way, but it's a train wreck worth watching because it's so unbelievable how bad it is. I laugh myself stupid everytime I watch this. You really gotta see this thing. Trailer below.

Video Violence:
     A husband and wife open a video store in a small town and learn the locals have a thing for snuff. Never ones to not meet customer demands, the couple begin making snuff films to rent to the town. Yeah, it sounds ridicules and it is. This one actually has impressive  gore for it's time and even had itself a sequel. For me, though, its biggest appeal is seeing a mom and pops video store circa mid 80's. All those videos and posters we see bring back a ton of memories. Miss those damn mom and pops stores!







     

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

So Carrot top is Pennywise....what's the problem?





     So recently it came down the horror pike that everyone's fav red headed comedian to hate, Carrot Top aka Scott Thompson, was cast as the uber creepy "Pennywise the Clown" in the remake of  Stephen King's "It".

     Then everyone lost their damn minds.

     I realise Carrot Top is not Tim Curry (Who is?), that goes without saying. Curry is a legend when it comes to playing creepy characters, and his shoes are enormous ones to fill. Personally, I had hopes Johnny Depp would have been cast as the evil clown, given that he's an awesome character actor and probably one of the few people alive who could deliver a performance on par with Curry's. However, upon learning that Carrot Top had the role, I wasn't upset. In fact, after some consideration, I thought it was a pretty cool idea. Allow me to explain before you start building a stake to burn me on...

     Has anyone actually looked at Carrot Top? I mean, seriously, have you really looked at him? Dude is creepy looking as fuck! He also has that weird voice. Close your eyes and picture dude dressed as a clown, laughing and making creepy jokes while handing candy to your kids. Go ahead, I'll wait...

     Yeah, see what I mean?

     If there is anyone that can seriously give me the heebie jeebies as an evil clown, it's this guy! He isn't that bad an actor either from what I can tell based on the many small roles he's played here and there. I mean he ain't winning an oscar anytime soon, but he can hold his own. I have faith he'll be effective in the role. Plus, he's different enough from Curry to perhaps bring a new perspective to it that won't seem like an attempt at copying Curry, which would be a freaking enormous mistake for any actor to attempt!

     Look, for all the folks who were hoping Curry would reprise the role: Hey, I feel ya, I'm a huge Curry fan myself ("Legend" anyone?). It would have been cool as fuck to see him donning the Pennywise suit again, but really, why would he want to play the role again? His turn as Pennywise is the stuff of legend, no reason to revisit it. Could he top it? Doubt it, especially since he's much older now. Curry has nothing to prove, his version of Pennywise ain't gonna be forgotten anytime soon. Word ta ya mutha!

     The rest of you naysayers who are spitting mad at the casting choice. Relax homies! Give the "Top" a chance, he may surprise you. At least reserve judgement till we get a peek at him in Pennywise mode. Remember, when Ledger was announced as the new Joker, people lost their shit, but now, most people agree he rocked that role. Don't worry, if Carrot Top sucks, I'll be the first to rip him a new arse hole on the web, cause my momma didn't teach me better than that!

     I know it's hard to be open minded when it comes to Hollywood fudging with classics, believe me, I don't care for all this remake madness currently sweeping Hollywood, but the original movie, while good, was a far cry from the totally awesome book (Which is my fav novel.). If not for Curry, it may not be as fondly remembered. Curry made that movie. Period.
     Plus it was a made for TV movie aired in the early 90's. I'm all for a big screen remake that will attempt to be darker and more in the spirit of the novel. Yeah, they're not going to follow the book exactly, but the filmmakers have promised a very dark telling of the classic.
     So all my sicko's, chillax! It's all good in the hood! As the convicts say in prison while waiting to see if they're gonna get parole, "Hope for the best but expect the worst." Either way, my shaved arse will be there opening day with an open mind and a bucket of extra buttery popcorn! Nuff said!

      One last thing, if ya haven't read the novel "It" by King, your missing out jackhole! Go to your local book store, to Amazon, or to your library (You've got options, no excuses....unless you're illiterate...in which case, my bad.) and get this shite! Now! I ain't playin' son!
     If all you saw was the movie, then you haven't seen all this twisted tale has to offer. So much more dark and twisted shiz that the movie didn't touch. Plus, King manages to explore the magic of childhood and why we should never lose touch with it. It really has so many layers. Easily King's masterpiece in this jerkoffs humble opinion! Oh, and don't let the massive 1,090 pages intimidate you, the book is so damn good and engrossing that's you'll fly through it and when ya reach the end you'll wish there was more!

So go read it, cause reading is fundamental and shit!



And that my friends is my opinion, and it couldn't be any more clearer than blood on the wall!